| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Fluffy Muffdiver | 5 | +1.80 (36.00%) | |
| D | Denny Dildo | 6 | -1.50 (-25.00%) | |
| D | Gaylord Focker | 5 | +1.20 (24.00%) |  |
| D | Benny Beavers | 5 | -1.80 (-36.00%) | |
| D | Billy Bullshit | 4 | +0.30 (7.50%) | |
| M | Virgin Hardcock | 5 | -0.10 (-2.00%) |  |
| M | Johnny Potsmoker | 5 | -0.50 (-10.00%) | |
| M | Abraham Arsehole | 5 | -0.80 (-16.00%) | |
| M | Dilbert Dickgraber | 5 | -0.90 (-18.00%) | |
| M | Freddie Fuckface | 5 | -2.30 (-46.00%) | |
| S | Spike Sperminator | 6 | +0.90 (15.00%) | |
| 5.09 | -3.70 (-6.61%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 5 | Aloísio Cristo | K | |
| -0.40 (-6.67%) | 6 | Anthony Greenacre | D | |
| +0.50 (12.50%) | 4 | Faro Zubizarreta | D | |
| -0.30 (-7.50%) | 4 | Besim Byzhuti | D | |
|
+3.70 (41.11%) | 9 | Reginald Hedley | M |
|
+2.00 (25.00%) | 8 | Edward Turley | M |
|
+2.00 (40.00%) | 5 | Jason Linton | M |
|
+1.30 (32.50%) | 4 | Gino Mondini | M |
| +1.30 (43.33%) | 3 | Roque Pallani | M | |
| -2.20 (-27.50%) | 8 | Paddy Chenery | S | |
| -0.80 (-16.00%) | 5 | Aureliano Azul | S | |
| +7.10 (11.64%) | 5.55 |