| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Richard Dawkins | 13 | -1.00 (-7.69%) | |
| D | Friedrich Nietzsche | 15 | +2.00 (13.33%) | |
| D | Ducu Pãtrunjel | 13 | +1.00 (7.69%) |  |
| D | Dick Rodger | 12 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| D | Christopher Hitchens | 11 | +1.00 (9.09%) |  |
| M | Bertrand Russell | 14 | +1.00 (7.14%) | |
| M | Richard Carrier | 13 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| M | Paul Abbott | 10 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| M | Bill Gates | 6 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| M | Dan Barker | 5 | +2.00 (40.00%) | |
| S | Douglas Adams | 11 | +2.00 (18.18%) | |
| 11.18 | +8.00 (6.50%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| -1.00 (-12.50%) | 8 | Ricky Gervais | K | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 10 | Les Dawson | D | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 9 | Kenny Everett | D | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 9 | Peter Cook | D | |
| -1.00 (-14.29%) | 7 | Dawn French | D | |
| -3.00 (-30.00%) | 10 | Ken Dodd | M | |
| -1.00 (-11.11%) | 9 | Bernard Manning | M | |
| -1.00 (-12.50%) | 8 | Dick Emery | M | |
| -2.00 (-28.57%) | 7 | Rhod Gilbert | M | |
| -2.00 (-40.00%) | 5 | Freddie Bridges | M | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 9 | Ronnie Corbett | S | |
| -11.00 (-12.09%) | 8.27 |