| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Fluffy Muffdiver | 5 | -0.40 (-8.00%) | |
| D | Denny Dildo | 6 | +0.60 (10.00%) | |
| D | Benny Beavers | 5 | +0.90 (18.00%) | |
| D | Gaylord Focker | 5 | -0.60 (-12.00%) | |
| D | Billy Bullshit | 4 | +1.50 (37.50%) | |
| M | Dilbert Dickgraber | 5 | +0.70 (14.00%) | |
| M | Johnny Potsmoker | 5 | +0.30 (6.00%) | |
| M | Virgin Hardcock | 5 | +0.20 (4.00%) | |
| M | Abraham Arsehole | 5 | -0.20 (-4.00%) | |
| M | Freddie Fuckface | 5 | -1.50 (-30.00%) | |
| S | Samuel Slutfucker | 5 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| 5.00 | +1.50 (2.73%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| +2.20 (44.00%) | 5 | Aloísio Cristo | K | |
 |
+0.80 (7.27%) | 11 | Felix Fortuna | D |
| +1.90 (47.50%) | 4 | Besim Byzhuti | D | |
| +1.00 (25.00%) | 4 | Edvin Björkqvist | D | |
| +1.90 (21.11%) | 9 | Reginald Hedley | M | |
| +4.60 (57.50%) | 8 | Edward Turley | M | |
 |
+2.80 (56.00%) | 5 | Jason Linton | M |
|
+0.80 (20.00%) | 4 | Sunti Tanasugarn | M |
|
+2.80 (140.00%) | 2 | Poyraz Sanmez | M |
| +1.40 (17.50%) | 8 | Paddy Chenery | S | |
| +0.80 (16.00%) | 5 | Aureliano Azul | S | |
|
-0.60 (-15.00%) | 4 | Gino Mondini | R |
| +20.40 (29.57%) | 5.75 |