| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Allan McGregor | 8 | -0.10 (-1.25%) | |
| D | Osório Barreiro | 8 | +1.10 (13.75%) | |
| D | Bartholomew Brown | 7 | +1.40 (20.00%) | |
| D | Captain Fishfingers | 7 | +1.20 (17.14%) | |
| D | Branislav Ivanovic | 5 | +2.10 (42.00%) | |
| D | Group Sex | 5 | +0.90 (18.00%) | |
| M | Frank Lampard | 8 | -1.20 (-15.00%) | |
| M | Jesus Christ | 7 | -0.10 (-1.43%) | |
| M | Cristiano Messi | 5 | +0.20 (4.00%) |  |
| S | Johann Steinsson | 10 | -4.30 (-43.00%) | |
| S | Francis MacLeish | 8 | +1.50 (18.75%) |  |
| 7.09 | +2.70 (3.46%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| -1.30 (-21.67%) | 6 | Joe Abercrombie | K | |
| +1.90 (23.75%) | 8 | Arlindo Wálter | D | |
| +1.30 (16.25%) | 8 | Stephen Townshend | D | |
| +1.80 (30.00%) | 6 | Aníbal Pontes | D | |
| -0.90 (-10.00%) | 9 | Hey Youguys | M | |
| -1.50 (-18.75%) | 8 | Remco Reiziger | M | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 7 | Niklas Krogsgaard | M | |
| -0.20 (-2.86%) | 7 | Acácio Estrada | M | |
| +0.10 (1.67%) | 6 | Alex Vicedomini | M | |
| -5.10 (-51.00%) | 10 | Yousef Suraya | S | |
|
+1.20 (15.00%) | 8 | Phelim Lunny | S |
|
+0.20 (3.33%) | 6 | Braeden Boyne | R |
| -2.50 (-2.81%) | 7.42 |