| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Shaun Rowett | 10 | +1.00 (10.00%) | |
| D | Al Hutson | 11 | -1.00 (-9.09%) | |
| D | Manfred Hausmann | 10 | +3.00 (30.00%) | |
| D | Jayjay McLovin | 10 | +2.00 (20.00%) | |
| D | Jayjay McMuffin | 9 | +2.00 (22.22%) | |
| D | Borat Sagdiyev | 8 | +2.00 (25.00%) | |
| M | Arthur Ahremark | 13 | +3.00 (23.08%) | |
| M | Indiana Jones | 10 | +5.00 (50.00%) |  |
| M | Jeff Stelling | 9 | +3.00 (33.33%) |  |
| M | Joshua Davison | 9 | -1.00 (-11.11%) | |
| S | Reggie Draper | 11 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| R | Double Andimsold | 8 | +1.00 (12.50%) | |
| R | Nemo Brown | 8 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| R | Alistair Neilson | 4 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| 9.29 | +20.00 (15.38%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 7 | Jayjay Okotcha | K | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 8 | Tomás Goulart | D | |
| -1.00 (-12.50%) | 8 | Ric Matzuzzi | D | |
| +1.00 (14.29%) | 7 | Tom Havercrotch | D | |
| +1.00 (16.67%) | 6 | Edgar Sveasson | D | |
| +1.00 (11.11%) | 9 | Racist Bastard | M | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 8 | Emile Orson | M | |
| -3.00 (-37.50%) | 8 | Rodrigo Villa | M | |
| +1.00 (16.67%) | 6 | Sticky Shivy | M | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 4 | Malcy Malcysson | M | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 7 | Crawford Crawf Crawford | S | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 8 | Jambags Andthe Gladrags | R | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 8 | Alan Sugar | R | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 5 | Daisy Does Dallas Ii | R | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 7.07 |