| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Mike Anthony | 9 | +1.00 (11.11%) | |
| D | Ian Jones | 10 | +4.00 (40.00%) | |
| D | Chocker Jones | 10 | +2.00 (20.00%) | |
| D | Peter McAlister | 8 | -1.00 (-12.50%) | |
| D | Robert Petherick | 5 | +1.00 (20.00%) | |
| M | Keith Furphy | 12 | -2.00 (-16.67%) | |
| M | Russell Toghill | 10 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| M | Darren Symes | 9 | -2.00 (-22.22%) |  |
| M | William Cole | 8 | -1.00 (-12.50%) |  |
| M | Ricky Bourne | 7 | -2.00 (-28.57%) | |
| S | Keith Bourne | 5 | +1.00 (20.00%) | |
| R | Glenn Boycott | 5 | -2.00 (-40.00%) | |
| 8.17 | -1.00 (-1.02%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| -3.00 (-33.33%) | 9 | Naked Jeff | K | |
| -1.00 (-11.11%) | 9 | Captain Fishfingers | D | |
| -1.00 (-12.50%) | 8 | Group Sex | D | |
| -2.00 (-25.00%) | 8 | John Terry | D | |
| -1.00 (-25.00%) | 4 | Ted MacAvery | D | |
| -2.00 (-20.00%) | 10 | Jesus Christ | M | |
| -3.00 (-30.00%) | 10 | Frank Lampard | M | |
| -2.00 (-22.22%) | 9 | Cristiano Messi | M | |
| -1.00 (-12.50%) | 8 | Lucas Piazon | M | |
| -1.00 (-12.50%) | 8 | Healthy Fastfood | S | |
| -2.00 (-28.57%) | 7 | Matias Cesar | S | |
| -1.00 (-11.11%) | 9 | Branislav Ivanovic | R | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 8 | John Keogh | R | |
| -20.00 (-18.69%) | 8.23 |