| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Naked Jeff | 10 | -2.00 (-20.00%) | |
| D | Branislav Ivanovic | 10 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| D | Captain Fishfingers | 10 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| D | John Terry | 9 | 0.00 (0.00%) |  |
| D | Fucking Skillz | 5 | -2.00 (-40.00%) |  |
| M | Frank Lampard | 11 | -2.00 (-18.18%) | |
| M | Cristiano Messi | 10 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| M | Lucas Piazon | 8 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| M | Juan Mata | 6 | -2.00 (-33.33%) | |
| S | Healthy Fastfood | 9 | -2.00 (-22.22%) | |
| S | Daniel Sturridge | 6 | -1.00 (-16.67%) | |
| 8.55 | -11.00 (-11.70%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| -2.00 (-28.57%) | 7 | Awal Ruswandi | K | |
|
-1.00 (-14.29%) | 7 | Fionlagh Macintosh | D |
| -2.00 (-33.33%) | 6 | Fionlagh Macinnes | D | |
| -2.00 (-33.33%) | 6 | Fionlagh Macconnachie | D | |
| -1.00 (-14.29%) | 7 | Fionlagh Mackenzie | M | |
| -4.00 (-57.14%) | 7 | Fionlagh Macdougal | M | |
| -2.00 (-33.33%) | 6 | Fionlagh Macsporran | M | |
| -2.00 (-33.33%) | 6 | Fionlagh Macgregor | M | |
|
0.00 (0.00%) | 8 | Rúben Faro | S |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 7 | Fionlagh Macduff | S | |
| -1.00 (-14.29%) | 7 | Ernest Devlin | R | |
| -1.00 (-16.67%) | 6 | Fionlagh Macpherson | R | |
| -18.00 (-22.50%) | 6.67 |