| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Casper Schmeichel | 12 | +2.00 (16.67%) | |
| D | Back Of The Net | 10 | +2.00 (20.00%) | |
| D | Big Matty Elliott | 10 | +1.00 (10.00%) | |
| D | Joris Karnebeek | 6 | +1.00 (16.67%) | |
| M | Steve Guppy | 11 | +3.00 (27.27%) |  |
| M | Darren Sicknote Anderton | 10 | +2.00 (20.00%) | |
| M | Karma Chameleon | 10 | -1.00 (-10.00%) |  |
| M | Andy Costello | 9 | +3.00 (33.33%) | |
| M | Andy King | 9 | +2.00 (22.22%) | |
| S | Emile Heskey | 10 | +4.00 (40.00%) | |
| S | Shola Ameobi | 8 | +4.00 (50.00%) | |
| R | Muzzy Izzet | 9 | +2.00 (22.22%) | |
| R | Stevie Walsh | 7 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| R | Florentino Venta | 5 | -1.00 (-20.00%) | |
| 9.00 | +24.00 (19.05%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 11 | Justin Lee Collins | K | |
|
+2.00 (16.67%) | 12 | Who Ate Adamsandler | D |
| +4.00 (44.44%) | 9 | Tom Havercrotch | D | |
| +4.00 (44.44%) | 9 | Iain Dyer Ear | D | |
| +1.00 (11.11%) | 9 | Captain Charisma | D | |
| +2.00 (18.18%) | 11 | Old Cunt Malcy | M | |
|
+4.00 (40.00%) | 10 | The Wezmoister | M |
| +3.00 (30.00%) | 10 | Jambags Andthe Gladrags | M | |
|
+3.00 (33.33%) | 9 | Sticky Shivy | M |
| +1.00 (20.00%) | 5 | Charlie Bejjita Adam | M | |
| -2.00 (-22.22%) | 9 | Pooper Bear | S | |
|
+1.00 (10.00%) | 10 | Alan Sugar | R |
| +2.00 (28.57%) | 7 | Malcy Malcysson | R | |
| +25.00 (20.66%) | 9.31 |