| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Justin Lee Collins | 11 | +2.00 (18.18%) | |
| D | Who Ate Adamsandler | 12 | -3.00 (-25.00%) | |
| D | Captain Charisma | 9 | +3.00 (33.33%) | |
| D | Iain Dyer Ear | 9 | +3.00 (33.33%) | |
| D | Tom Havercrotch | 9 | +3.00 (33.33%) | |
| M | Old Cunt Malcy | 11 | +4.00 (36.36%) |  |
| M | Quitter Jambags | 11 | +2.00 (18.18%) |  |
| M | Jambags Andthe Gladrags | 10 | +3.00 (30.00%) | |
| M | The Wezmoister | 10 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| M | Malcy Malcysson | 7 | +2.00 (28.57%) | |
| S | Pooper Bear | 9 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| R | Alan Sugar | 10 | +2.00 (20.00%) | |
| R | Daisy Does Dallas Ii | 8 | +2.00 (25.00%) | |
| R | Hardcorephysco Wez | 5 | +1.00 (20.00%) | |
| 9.36 | +24.00 (18.32%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| -2.00 (-15.38%) | 13 | Shaun Rowett | K | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 13 | Manfred Hausmann | D | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 12 | Jayjay McLovin | D | |
| +1.00 (10.00%) | 10 | Borat Sagdiyev | D | |
| -1.00 (-7.69%) | 13 | Indiana Jones | M | |
| +1.00 (8.33%) | 12 | Jeff Stelling | M | |
| +1.00 (9.09%) | 11 | Joshua Davison | M | |
| -1.00 (-9.09%) | 11 | Ilove Gerard | M | |
| -4.00 (-36.36%) | 11 | Double Andimsold | M | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 10 | Ollie Guy | S | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 5 | The Wizard | S | |
| -1.00 (-10.00%) | 10 | Lauren Ledsham | R | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 8 | Hard Trainer | R | |
| 0.00 (0.00%) | 5 | Bejitta Swole | R | |
| -6.00 (-4.17%) | 10.29 |