| Pos | Name | Skill | Performance | |
| K | Angus Aberdeen | 12 | 0.00 (0.00%) | |
| D | Usain McBolt | 14 | +3.00 (21.43%) | |
| D | Rolland Sausage | 14 | +2.00 (14.29%) | |
| D | Soltan Sauce | 13 | +2.00 (15.38%) |  |
| M | Ray Needay | 14 | -2.00 (-14.29%) | |
| M | Murdo Renton | 12 | +5.00 (41.67%) | |
| M | Paul Ingles | 11 | +5.00 (45.45%) |  |
| M | Jordan Coppell | 9 | +5.00 (55.56%) | |
| M | Dunstan Grech | 9 | +5.00 (55.56%) | |
| S | Ally McCoist | 13 | +4.00 (30.77%) | |
| S | Montes Bucchioni | 8 | +3.00 (37.50%) | |
| 11.73 | +32.00 (24.81%) |
Possession / Performance
| Performance | Skill | Name | Pos | |
| +1.00 (12.50%) | 8 | Roy Gillespie | K | |
| +2.00 (13.33%) | 15 | Irving Brunette | D | |
| +1.00 (9.09%) | 11 | Marc Bolan | D | |
| +1.00 (20.00%) | 5 | Caleb Merton | D | |
|
0.00 (0.00%) | 14 | Edward Longshanks | M |
|
+4.00 (33.33%) | 12 | Craig Monkhouse | M |
| +4.00 (33.33%) | 12 | Tom Huddlestone | M | |
| +3.00 (25.00%) | 12 | John Cleese | M | |
|
+2.00 (25.00%) | 8 | Callum Mulholland | M |
| +2.00 (18.18%) | 11 | Jeff Beck | S | |
|
+1.00 (20.00%) | 5 | Lily Bergman | S |
| +21.00 (18.58%) | 10.27 |